This lady who is always looking up at the clouds. Shes always laying on her back in a field looking at them. It was in the lot behind Walmart.. I’d see her when I’d walk bacl from work in the morning I work the 3rd shift stocking shelves at walmrt, and I get out at 7:00 am. When they’d let me out leave early I’d see her going to the field as the sun came up.
I assume she watches the sun come up on the clouds I assume she watches the clouds because she’s only out there during the day which is when clouds come out. I have a crush on her but she might be too old or have kids you never know.
I clocked out and got a snack from Meijer gas station.the cashier register thought she laid there all day because he never saw her get up accetpt to go home as the sun went down.We decided not to talk to byunches of people about that cause theyll bother if they knew she was there. We think she might be somewhat ‘out there,”
Her hairs is dyed badly black and matted. She reminds me of Phil Spector but hot. She sits in the sun all day while still being white as a ghost with a little pudge. She has thin legs and a beautiful belly that shows a bit through her shirt when she lays down. It looks like a heap of oatmeal spilled onto the floor. She wears sweatpants that are too small. They smell probably she wears them every day no matter the weather.
“No they don’t smell, ” she told me when I asked her if they smelt. She also said, “Also you are skinny.” I felt bad from that and she said this without looking away from the sky too. Also I discoevered she sprays herself with SPF 50 suncreen in order to keep her skin like milky white doves.
“What are you doing later?”
“Stop bothering me Im watching clouds”
“Do you want to go on a date”
“No, I don’t even like boys only clouds.” I went home then and didn’t sleep cause I was so upset at her for sayning no to me (I go to sleep in the morning because I work nights). My brother was watching TV loudbecause he is a dick. That did not help me with not sleeping! I smacked my wall like “Shut up with the TV, okay?!!”
When went to work night shift at Meijer at 11:30 I stopped by the gas station again to get an caffeinated beverage because I was tired and t was the same guy as before there I talked to.
“I wish I was a cloud!” I told him him after saying how she liked clouds not me.
“Do you think she meant she would like you better as a cloud?!”
“It could be.”
“Or not. It could be you dont ever have a chanve of her ever wanting you how you want her women don’t love men they pretend because they cannot have babies on their own. Also, they want to go places when its dark out without being scared. They only make babies with us because they are scared of men and so when they make a baby its 50/50 boy or girl and if its a boy then they have a small man they can take it out on by making him feel bad until he grows up with no self esteem to say no anymore to anything and is her baby puppet of her whims.”
“why did you say all that I think girls theyre are awesome”
“A happy thing indeed it is to die unwedded virgin”
“Whose hurt you in your life?”
“And If what you want for her is to notice you, why do you not go up there?. The vent out back has exhaust-steam going all the way up to the clouds from down here. Go up that like its is some stairs.”
“Okay.” I said. I went up to the access panel in the air duct and got inside and it was hot and dark and I banged around the sides a lot before I could find the exhaust. I got to the steam come out of it and walked up it as a stair to the sky.
I arrived there but a party was going on and a bouncer wouldn’t let me in. I shook the pearly gates by their bars and yelling “just let me in” but he said, “No. Do you have a membership?”
“A membership?”
“Yeah, a cloud or bird membership? “
“all right” I went back down and talked ot my friend about that.
“Well,” he said, “how bad do you like her/ want to impress her?”
“enough to relinquish my corporeal body”
“Good bro glad to hear it bro cause that’s what its going to take.”
“What could you mean?”
“You must leave your earthly abode behind and S U B L I M A T Eonto another place of existence .”
“no but how? I am too big/ wet/ full of orgabs to burn very easily into smoke”
“no but listen I will have to kill you and put you into my smoker and dry your giblets out in the smoker and take their essence back via party balloon and send you up the vent here. I have a smoker.”
“bro youd do that for me”
“yeah man unquestionably but you are cool if I cut you up into giblets?? I have this meat smoker I built in my back yard but its more for bacon and stuff so I’ll have to put you into smaller giblets first ”
“sure okay”
“and next thing you know he brained me with a baseball bat.”
THE END.
and next thing you know I woke up and as a billowy blossom of smoke blowing up a balloon and the guy let me out into the loud vent-fan behind gas station (it made a hilarious farrt sound!) I walked the exhaust steam stairs to heaven with what would appear to be my cloud membership. It was easy to climb I was so trim!
“haha my man youre basically a cloud get in here” said the bouncer/ st peter.
“Im a cloud?”
“Yeah almost Definitely cloudy enough for my book: I count it.”
“Okay.” I said past the pearly gates and it was a big party in there dancing loud music and lights and some drinks too. Were all having a good time.
I hung around for a while and chatted it up with some people I’d been meaning to see like my grandma my uncle my dog (yes I know this is controversial but he was there dogs do go toheaven) and Dante de Allighieri. dante wasn’t that interesting because he only spoke Italian so I pretended to be interested and laugh when he laughed but I pretended to get more punch and hid from him in the restroom. I had trouble locating John Lemon but perhaps it required a longer look.Where all of a sudden I remembered to do my mission.
I was nervous I looked down at the gas station and my small friend gave me a small thumbs up. I was like “gotta go for it.” I couldn’t hear what he said (too far away) but and probably said “don’t chicken now” I looked over the cloud-edge by the grils fieldd.ld It was still nite so I had to weight longer.
Then its 2 am and everyone left for the night. The bartender was cleaning up and I asked him if it was cool if I stayed awhile and he said “ absoluure;y the party never ends”” I laid on my belly looked down with my elbows on the floor[?] of the clod with my face in my palms watching for her.
The ground below was dark and dusky and thus I knew the sun would come soon. I last-minute had to look forsomething to check my hair in my reflection. I found one but couldn’t tell what m hair looked like in it it was too cloudy it was made of clouds. I guessed I looked pretty nice and or handsome (I guessed this way for confidence.)
I lean over and there she is on her way to her spot. Her spot in the grass was patted down in her shape of her like when deers bed in the woods and its patted down like that. She laid there and ogled at the Clouds from the gournd. Which was me! She smiled and I did. I said, ‘hi’ she said ‘hi’ and it was then I knew that if I aske d her out on a date she would maybe say yes.
THE END.
Joel Russell